Monday, 29 November 2010

My Bums Too Big

It's one of the most useless starts to any conversation (argument) you'll going to have with your loved one. It's usually after you've botched it, and she's no longer talking to you that you think: I wish it went like...

Her: My bum's too big, isn't it?

You: What do you mean?

Her: I'm not attractive with such a big bum.

You: On what basis are you judging?

Her: Basis? It's too big.

You: (sigh) Do you like women? (Nothing wrong if you're bi. I hope you'd be able to tell me, if you were.)

Her: No, of course not. You know I'm not: we've been married for years.

You: Okay. Just stay with me. So, you don't fancy women, right?

Her. (frown) That's right.

You: So the mechanism to judge if a women is attractive - the size of her bum is attractive - to a man isn't part of your makeup, in any way, right?

Her: (deeper frown) Yeah. I suppose. So?

You: Okay, so again, on what basis do you judge? You can't see the size of your bum through my appreciative eyes. And what's more, I'd bop anyone on the nose that said anything derogatory about your bum, or any other part of you, for that matter.

Her: But my bum is still too ...

You: (Bop)

Her: Ow! What was that for? (Grin)

You: (Grin) You were warned.


firstwalt said... quote the great Freddie Mercury: "Fat Bottomed Girls You Make The Rockin World Go Round" !

I especially like #1 & #10

Great Job Ptathuk

ptathuk said...


Thank you for taking the time to comment, and for the encouragement.

Hope you've also encouraged a 'Fat Bottomed Girl' or two?


firstwalt said...

Ptathuk, yes there has been a lady or two in my life that would qualify :) !

Switching gears for a moment : we have chastity and cuckolding, is there any room for ruined orgasms ?

ptathuk said...


I thought I had published one or two. Maybe not. I've been keeping this blog for almost two years, now. Wow! Time flies, when you're full of endorphines!

These get published in a hap-hazard way. Ruined-cums are sure to come along, sooner or later. Maybe like buses, wait for ages, then a whole pack arrives!