Hired Help

I've always liked the maid fantasy. I'm quite partial to a bit of room service. However, being submissive, I often think along these lines...

Seeking Therapy

You know, I don't need to seek therapy for my obsessive, compulsive behaviour, right? I'm as sane as anyone. Honest! I've found an outlet. And I must admit, I enjoy this blogging. I hope others enjoy it too, not just the endorphin rushes. I do feel sorry for those still dazed and confused. It can last decades. I know. But there is help, at hand.

The obvious is the Internet; Anarchy incarnate, where everything and anything is under discussion. Also, there are professionals available. I think I've mentioned this before; I've never used a lady of negotiable virtue. I'm too much of a romantic, and I don't separate sex and love. (For those that can - fine. It's just not me.) The one circumstance, I think, where I would is to help a partnership. A marriage counsellor that gets right to the bottom of things! (Sorry - couldn't resist.) A situation where regular counsellors would be next to useless. Get the right professional for the job.

Just Helping

Wouldn't the world be a better place if we just helped each other? Of course it would. I suppose the next government that figures out how to create such a world would never loose power. Maybe we should start small, first?

Open Mind

There is no greater gift than an open mind.

The Fine Line

It should go without saying that play needs to be safe, sane AND consensual. But the message is so imprtant, it's worth repeating; ad-nausium.

However, being 'forced' could be all part of the play. (Negociated before-hand, of course.) Oh, such doe-eyes!

You were warned!

If she warned you to be careful what you wished, would you listen?

No, I didn't think so.

Not So Innocent

There's something about the nice girl 'front' but depraved 'back' that I find really appealing. You know, the kind of girl you can take home to meet your parents, but in reality she's the kind of girl they warned you about?

Oh, I want one of those! Ho-hum!

Tell Me Stories

Obviously, part of the reason I like to caption images is that they tell me a story. I can almost hear the voices of the people in the pictures. It's like reading a book, and hearing the voices play like a move.

I would love to have a partner that told me stories.

A Mad Moon

They say that the moon influences cycles of madness. (Love Pink Floyd's 'Dark Side Of The Moon'.) Is this fantasy mad?

Shrinking

A little while ago I read a story where a couple discover that the small chastity device was shrinking his cock. He got such a buzz from this, they decided to see how far they could take it.

The story also contained a cuckolding theme, which was less impertant to me. What really did it for me was the way in which she quized him on what turned him on, and then did her best to do it for him. (Incurable romantic alert!)

I've not seen any more stories by the author, which is a shame. He had a very easy to read style.

Emmotional Rollercoaster

I don't know about you, but my fantasies are very much linked to how I'm feeling. Bizarrely it's not when I'm depressed or upset that I feel most masochistic. I've no wisdom or insight to offer here, just the observation. - Oh, and a fantasy...

Not Ready

A few years ago I was approached by a lovely lady at a monthly fetish market. Her opening line was very flimsy. "Do I know you from somewhere?" Very cute. At the time I was going through some awful life stuff (nothing to do with a relationship), and the last thing I wanted to do was inflict my problems on another.

I often think of her, and deeply regret not being in a position to accept her conversation invitation. Looking back, I think she was as lonely as I was. A large part of my regret is not even taking the time to find out. (A measure of how awful my life was, then.)

I would like to apologise to her, and hope she found someone, at the market. Slim chance that she should read this, but perhaps the eather will deliver the carma?

Sometimes carpe diem is easier said than done. We are human, and we make mistakes.

Ask For Directions

Why don't guys ask for directions? Is it a macho thing? Of course you could always change where it is you want to go.

(Leaping here.) Same can be said with relationships. But then I can't help but realise that communication is a two-way street. I raise this as I've taken out a number of ladies where the chemistry wasn't quite right. Only one was open and honest enough to tell me straight. The rest just faded away. I can't help but view this as cowardly behaviour. And it's us guys that get this rep!

I think everyone would be a lot happier if everyone asked for directions. (Even if it's to the exit door.)

Pain And Suffering

Did it ever occur to a vanilla partner that pain and suffering is a gift? Well, bit of a leap there. The link is endorphins. They are drugs. And they make you feel great. The best bit is that you can't get arrested for possession. These little chemicals are perfectly legal. You see, they are manufactured by the body. Oh yeah!

Don't get me wrong. I've never taken anything that wasn't perscribed by a Doctor. I can't see why anyone would want to risk 'highs', if they didn't personnally know the chemist was compitent. Not to mention the resulting conversations with the constablary.

Meanwhile, back at the endorphin rush. The body produces these little darlings when you have an orgasm, when you get injured, or are in pain. They are even produced when you do sports, or have a tough session at the gym. They are natures little pain killers. So, first the pain, then the bliss; got it? Now you know why all those guys pump iron, or go long-distant running. For those reading this, it's probaly a large part of why you enjoy a good spanking. (Ah, hot crossed buns!)

Word of warning: Too much good is bad. Like any drug, the resulting highs can be addictive. (Obsessive Compulsive here!) It is why people like David Duchovny ended up in Sex Addiction rehab. As long as you can recognise the down, when your partner is away, for example, you should be okay. It is more upsetting to go through this when you have no idea what it is.

Anyway... Sod the roses, just give me the thorns!

Outfits Maketh the Woman

To home in once again on the biological theme of Women do the attracting. - Ladies, don't get put off by your man wanting certain outfits to inspire him. This is just how we are 'wired'. We show love in a different way. Playing the game will have it's rewards.

If you think a particular outfit looks silly, just remember why you were asked to wear it. Also, you were the one he asked. - A demonstration of trust, if ever there was one. If you really object, tell him, but it would be nice if you could offer an alternative.

This might seem one sided, but I guess what I'm homing in on here is communication. Talking to one another should always be a first choice.

So Where Do You Keep These Images?

So where exactly do you keep these, and other, files you download? Do you want to be discovered? Too shy to just come out and say what you want, or need? I think being open and honest will go a long way to demonstrate trust. You can always use the images as props in your discussions.

Make Sure Before You Go For It

Reading all the Forums and Blogs, they all say you should build up to longer chastity times. Good advice. You don't want to abandon your favourite fantasy, because of impacience, do you?

People Are Programmable

It's amazing how susceptible we all are to being programed. Just look at advertising techniques. I've often wondered what would happen if we tried to programme our relationships.

At Her Feet

What any of us wouldn't do for a partner in crime (fantasy)? Someone to play the game with us, just like in the movies (in our heads). Ah, the dream...

Fishing Trips

To really get into someone else's head, you need to ask questions. Some of the best stories I've read involve this. (Incurable romantic alert!) I think it's one of the ultimate demonstrations of love that someone is willing to use so much effort to get to know me. Remember though, this should be a two-way street.

Onwards and Upwards

After a while, the novelty of control may seem to wane. Rather that get into a downward spiral, take a brake. I know this Blog is about obsession, but really, the same old thing can get boring. Especially for a partner not quite so obsessive. You can always fantasise.

Goddess Syndrome

It's very easy for a male submissive to place his loved one on a pedistal. Just remember that some people are frieghtened of hieghts.

Skimpy Fetish Gear

It's established that the female is the one that usually does the attracting. (makup, hair-doos, multi-coloured dresses, etc.) One thing with this obsession of mine: the sexier the outfit...

Don't Sulk

You should be beyond childish things, or so one would think. No matter how old we get, there are always things that are important to us. Things that seem the centre of the universe, at the time.

It's reconned that females rearly progress beyond the mental age of sixteen. Whoa! Before you ladies start pelting me with rotten fruit. - In the same reconning, males rarely progress beyond the mental age of twelve.

So it may not be such a stretch for us all to exhibit some childish behaviour, now and again. It's hoped that age also gives us a little wisdom, to better deal with these little outbursts.

What we want to see

We all see what we want to see. Very few of us (myself excluded) can see what is there, if we don't expect it. I find this particularly annoying in Call Centre staff. But then I remind myself, could I do any better, relying on just a voice on a poor phone line?

We all know the stories, from our childhood. They were told to us to illustrate and teach us a good moral centre. Stories like, The Boy Who Cried Wolf, The Ugly Duckling, and The Emperor's New Clothes.

Promises

I think a man (or woman) is as good as their word. How much they say (under their control) that actually comes true. To me this shows the strength of a character. - The ulimate worth of a person.

I hate life as a poker game; I'd much rather it was a chess game.

Smart-arse twists of the language to avoid telling the truth are just as bad as lies. If you don't want to get found out tmorrow, don't lie today.

There is an awful trend where people say all sorts of things rather than possibly hurt someones feelings. In my view, this just stores up trouble for later. This awful trend can be traced back to our childhood. The response to our query, "Are we there yet?" is met with, "Soon." When nothing could be further than the truth.

Like Alice, you should do three impossible things before breakfast, then make a promise AND keep it.

Don't Be Too Self-conscious

Some of us are quite shy, and get pink cheeks at the slightest thing. However, this means that we may miss out on a lot of fun. Think again. Try something new. As long as you don't scare the straights, you should be okay.

In Need Of A Brake

It's been too long since I had a decent holiday. I think it makes me less patient with those around me. If I was in a long-term relationship, they would be catching the brunt of it. It's up to all of us to spot this kind of presure, and not take it out on our loved ones. After all, it's not their fault.

Now here's an holiday idea...

Boots made for NOT walking

Rumour has it that high heels were invented by men to keep their women under control. (Very difficult to run in stilettos.) To coin a phrase: the times they are a-changing.

I've often thought that in this time of sexual equality, it is an inordanent waste of time to ever think total equality is possible. The sexes lead in different areas, and that is as good as it can get. Before you start pelting me with rotten fruit; men can't give birth. See? Men might do the asking out (most of the time), but the women knows if he's going to get lucky almost immediately. And then there's the whole area of FemDom. (My personal favourite.)

I think Leopold put it best in his book, Venus in Furs. Severin observes that in any relationship one must be the hammer while the other is the anvil. With this arrangement, I think, it's possible to make things, like a loving relationship.

Itch You Can't Scratch

Looking for a keyholder is like having an itch you can't scratch; at best, highly annoying.

(Don't forget, games are fun. If they're not, you're doing something wrong. For heaven's sake, talk about it.)

Time Travel

If you could travel in time, what would you change? For an obsessive compulsive that's easy. - Start designing and making steel chastity belts.

This lady is from the 1950s. I would love to have met her. She looks like she had a lot of fun with all these outfits her husband got for her.

Nobody Forgets Their First Time

Your first time is always special. If you were lucky enough to be in love at the time, then all the better. As you get older, and search for 'the one', the search will also include other firsts. First oral sex, first spanking, etc.

I've often fantasised about being in love with my first keyholder.

Too Lucky?

If you're lucky enough to have an understanding partner, and they are brave enough to tackle your fantasies, would there be any reason to stop them?

There could, of course, be loads of reasons. However, one comes to mind: miscommunication. If you've gushed your fantasies, it's very difficult to separate what is in your head (and should stay there), and what part you want to act out. Tiny steps! There's enormous fun to be had on a voyage of discovery. Take a slow steamer, instead of a supersonic jet. You can relax more and perhaps admire the scenery.

Ordering On-line

It makes you wonder how we all ever got on without the information super-highway. Buying anything is just a few clicks (and a smack on the credit card) away. Too bad peace, love and happiness are not as easy to come by.

Like A Fast Flowing River

A fantasy I'm keen on is where my partner listens to my ideas, then takes those ideas further. Then, further...

Serious Role Playing

Have you ever seen bloopers on a show or on a DVD? Fun, aren't they. The games lovers play are meant to be fun too, but try not to brake character. Think of it as a performance in a play. If it becomes tedious, and you're not enjoying it, stop. Find out why, and with any luck, correct the fault.

There is nothing worse than a game for two, when only one wants to play. Work it through, together.

While I Was Sleeping Too

I love just sleeping with a partner. (Must be the pack animal in me coming out!) Keyholders, what do you see when you watch him sleep? His true face? What does the expression tell you?

While I Was Sleeping

When I was sleeping, I had a dream about chastity. Then I woke up in my dream, and I was locked up in bed. It was such a good dream that I went back to sleep to return to it, but I woke up. Or am I still dreaming?

It's A Gift

When someone trusts you to put them in some kind of bondage, never forget it's a very important gift.