After all, if there's nothing in it for her, why would she play?
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3 years ago
Saturday, 11 July 2009
However Extreme You Think It Is
What's the most extreme chastity fantasy you can think of? Whatever it is, I think that the majotity of these fantasies will centre around the guy. Of course these fantasies are from a guy, therefore must be from a guys point of view, right? But I try to also imagine, what's in it for her?
After all, if there's nothing in it for her, why would she play?
After all, if there's nothing in it for her, why would she play?
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7 comments:
What's in it for me?
Unfortunately, too often I see things like "But I'll treat you better, and I'll stop jerking off, and I'll do more chores." The problem is that those are the kind of things that he should be doing anyway.
How about "What would you *like* to have?"
BTW, nice choice of pics lately. I was getting tired of the Chastity Island thing.
Tom,
Hit the proverbial nail, once again. One can find out so much by asking questions. Sadly, one would think it rocket science, as they are so thin on the ground.
The Chastity Island thing comes and goes. I find my fantasies change over time as my tastes. Today I fancy Greek food, but by tomorrow it'll be Chineese. And so on...
ptathuk
My most extreme fantasy: some sort of inescapable implanted cage (http://chasteerotica.blogspot.com/2006/12/kolkislavia-opening-to-permanent.html)
"What's in it for her?" is a damn good question. I'm with Tom on the idea that you can't offer vanilla relationship improvements, since you should be achieving these anyway. Really you're offering her one or both of two things: a kinky substitute for normal intimacy; and permission to be selfish in mundane and erotic ways.
I love the picture of the ponyboy led by the balls. Do you know where it came from.
Thanks
Giles,
Thanks for the link. Bit too out of consensual for my tastes. Prefer it if he's the willing cause of his own downfall.
Thank you for adding your voice to the whole relationship improvement issue. Spot on.
MPJ,
I can't remember exactly. I think it was in one of the Image Fap collections. I would love to see more from this series.
ptathuk
Re the Kolkislavia story: Well, you did ask for "extreme". However, he will have opportunities to escape, so the downfall(s) will when he chooses to stay locked in.
Re Relationships
On reflection - reading a comment somebody made on my blog - I think some couples *can* use chastity etc as a way of collapsing inner conflicts in their favour. However, I think such people start off with very conflicting imperatives, e.g. Be a Man versus Be a Perfect Husband. It doesn't really fix anything; rather it's a workaround. The relationship only improves in the sense that the couple no longer have anything to argue over.
For the rest of us more normal people, I think the BDSM can be a healthy excursion into an eroticised dysfunctional version of our normal healthy relationship.
More here: http://chasteerotica.blogspot.com/2009/07/whats-in-it-for-her-continued-dark-side.html
Giles,
Sorry I missed this comment for so long.
Thank you for the link. I liked your analysis. I've known several couples that match the dark side description, and have split up, before they really hurt themselves. (Emotionally, I mean.) Something to bear in mind.
ptathuk
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